Extraordinary League of Gentlemen
by Lady Laur
Summary: Elven Lord(and a wizard) form a gentlemens group and pandemonium ensues. ErestorLindir, ElrondThranduil, GlorfindelCeleborn, HaldirOMC
1. Default Chapter

Tittle: Extraordinary League of Gentlemen  
  
Author: Melyanna )  
  
Disclaimer: All things related to The Lord of The Rings belong to J.R.R Tolkien, I merely own the creativity bursts my brain has every now and then, if you can call it that... No profit is being made out of this besides self-esteem boost, so please don't sue.  
  
Pairings: Erestor/Lindir, Glorfindel/Celeborn, Elrond/Thranduil, Haldir/? Genre: Romance with droplets of humor in it. Just droplets Warning: AU Summary: Elf lords (and a wizard) form a gentlemen's club and pandemonium ensues  
  
Chapter summary: The League has a reunion and an intruder. May the Valar guard this Elf, for the Lords will not let it pass. G  
  
Chapter Rating: PG-13 Beta read by Krit, and Sas, thank you ladies. Any remaining mistakes are mine. Thanks for the positive critics I got, especially Mira, Sas and Krit I'm glad you liked it . A/N: Have fun! Oh! And I love Thranny, really do.  
  
Extraordinary League of Gentlemen: Part I  
  
Glorfindel raised his hand above his head, eyebrow cocked, and waited for silence. The Elda coughed gently and smiled at all sitting in the semi- circle, a mischievous gleam in his eyes. He was standing at the head of the semicircle of chairs; with Elrond and Mithrandir on his right, Erestor and Celeborn on his left and Haldir sitting in the center of the room, a small table in front of him that supported a heavy book.  
  
"My fellow Elves, wizard, it is now time to start another session of the Extraordinary League of Gentlemen. All please be seated so we may start." He spoke seriously, carefully watching the present Elves.  
  
"Are all present?" The blond asked quickly learning the answer as the present Elves raised their hands and waited for Glorfindel to raise his own.  
  
"Oi! Oi! Oi!" The all shouted loudly raising their fisted hands and then silencing immediately.  
  
Glorfindel nodded his head and Elrond stood up reaching for the book at the small table in front of Haldir.  
  
The Lord of Imladris opened the book and cleared his throat before speaking.  
  
"My friends, today is the day we welcome a new member to the League. Every year we contemplate someone fitting and dear to all with an invitation to join us as an honorary member, and such was done with Lord Celeborn until he became a permanent member of the group, although only joining us when visiting Imladris. This year we have chosen Haldir, the March Warden of the Lórien woods to pass our test and become one of our trusted friends." Turning to the silver haired Elf, who seemed almost frightened, he smiled.  
  
"Haldir of Lórien, I will now introduce you to all the members of the league and their respective functions, then you will hear the sacred rules of the league, and only after agreeing to respect them shall you be submitted to our final test. Do you understand?"  
  
A small nod came from Haldir and Elrond proceeded. "I am Elrond, spokesman of the league; Mithrandir is the entertainment manager, Erestor is first secretary and security guard, Celeborn our second in command of the security and secrecy and Glorfindel is the president and founder. Clear? Very well, I shall read the rules." Elrond respectfully looked at Glorfindel and waited for a nod to proceed.  
  
"The Extraordinary League of Gentlemen is a select group for the enjoyment and fulfillment of our mundane desires.  
  
Rule Number one: The League was created with the intent of pure fun and discussions of alien matters such as work or personal problems will not be tolerated unless a special session is scheduled.  
  
Number two: No secret is allowed between the members of the group, being of extreme importance to share every and all 'experiences' had in the time window between two sessions.  
  
Number three: All arguments directly involving members of the league shall be resolved sparring to relieve the tensions and no offensive words shall be exchanged during the competitions.  
  
Number four: No member of the league is allowed to stay sober for more then two hours during the meetings.  
  
Number five: All who side with King Thranduil will immediately become our enemies and are therefore banned from the league.  
  
Number six: If such member does 'side' with Lord Thranduil and share all information with us, he will be immediately decorated with our vow of trust and admiration.  
  
Number seven: If a member brings old food to the meetings, he will be forced to strip tease and coat his own body with said food.  
  
Number eight: No formal robes.  
  
Number nine: No word of the League shall be spread.  
  
Representative words of the league: Loyalty and Wildness."  
  
When Elrond finished reading, Erestor was nodding as if the rules were a very intelligent piece of advice, Glorfindel was grinning smugly as was Celeborn. Mithrandir was voicelessly reciting the rules he knew by heart while rearranging the pipe weed on his pipe and Haldir was starting at the lord of the Last Homely House with wide eyes.  
  
"Agreed?"  
  
"Yes, My Lord." Haldir muttered.  
  
"Oh yes, Elrond please write down our golden rule, no tittles." Glorfindel stated and clasped his hands together watching the dark haired Elf perform his task and then return to his seat.  
  
The small room they were in was Glorfindel's study, so unused that it had proved to be the perfect place for a secret and undisturbed meeting. Beyond the semi-circle of chairs in which the members of the league were sitting there was a large wooden table of great craftsmanship. On the table were various types of alcoholic beverages, pipe weed, fruits, bread, cheese and some scrolls.  
  
Ignoring Haldir for a moment, certain the Lórien Elf would fulfill his tasks, the president of the group, Glorfindel, turned to Mithrandir and gave him an anxious look.  
  
"Come my friend, make us wait no longer and please tell what you have brought to entertain us tonight."  
  
The old wizard stood up, dressed in simple brown trousers and a loose white shirt instead of his usual white robes. Smiling knowingly to his friend, the Maia took the scrolls in his hands and distributed them to the council members, keeping two to himself and unrolling, revealing the picture of a beautiful, semi-nude Elf covered only by a sheet.  
  
"This is the lucky view I had of the Mirkwood advisor Saelbeth. I had it painted of course, but unfortunately he would not pose as a model." The wizard grinned broadly watching the mesmerized expressions in his friend's eyes.  
  
"The other paintings I distributed are of a dancer who resembles him greatly and will be kindly joining us for the annual League party next month."  
  
"Oi! Oi! Oi!" The Elves shouted excitedly and applauded the thick bearded wizard.  
  
"Mithrandir you never cease to amaze me. No better choice was made then putting you in charge of the entertainment. But what is that last scroll on your hand? Something even more precious?" The Balrog slayer anxiously looked at the yellowish paper trying to see through the back of it.  
  
"Ah, well, this is something I judge quite evil of myself as I do not dislike the Mirkwood king, but knowing of your great appreciation for...making fun of him, I discovered the artist who painted Saelbeth is very creative and a specialist in painting without models, so I had him paint this, which will hopefully be framed and placed at our very secret meeting room once we decide the definitive place." The scroll was opened and revealed the picture of a naked Thranduil with a wild looking hair drinking a large mug of beer while having two dwarfs nibbling his neck.  
  
Erestor and the other Elves roared with laughter, even Haldir held himself hard on the chair not to fall down. Several minutes passed before the room quieted again.  
  
"Ah, you old rag! You have outdone yourself again." Celeborn spoke merrily, smiling at the surprised looked on Haldir's face.  
  
Glorfindel wiped tears from his eyes as he caught his breath in order to speak again. "Now that Haldir has had a taste of what our meetings are about, we will decide what your test will be... ah, yes Erestor?"  
  
"Before we do that, we should decide on the surprised member."  
  
"Ah yes! I almost forgot. Thank you for reminding me. Erestor takes great pleasure in the surprised members, I mean, in choosing the surprised members." Glorfindel snickered as Erestor rolled his eyes, knowing the apparently serious Elf was much more than met the eye.  
  
"Well, tradition says that besides inviting someone to join the league each year, we also surprise someone with the invitation in a different way. We usually study those all around us until we come up with one Elf, or person of any fitting race and... attack him. You are probably thinking right now, Haldir, that it is exactly what we did to you, but the difference is that the surprised member is always someone who seems unfitting to enter the league, such as someone shy, overly serious, grumpy, you name it. That is how dear Erestor made it to the group..." The blond Elda finished, grinning wickedly at his friend.  
  
"If that is how you call the act of you begging me to join your, up until then, league of two gentlemen, then so be it." The advisor retorted.  
  
"Erestor, Erestor, Erestor, do not make me share what your admission tasks were, please."  
  
Erestor's eyes almost bulged out of their sockets. "You would not."  
  
"Would too."  
  
"Would not!"  
  
"So would!"  
  
"Stop it!" Elrond shot Mithrandir a thankful look when the wizard interrupted the two friends.  
  
"Do you have anyone in mind yet?" Celeborn asked as if the subject had never been interrupted.  
  
"No, not yet, but it is good for us to start looking." Erestor spoke before Glorfindel could interfere.  
  
"Very well, all are warned, keep your eyes open from now on. As I was saying Haldir, we have had honor and surprised members before, such as Aragorn and Faramir. Aragorn for the simple reason we knew he would try to avert his eyes at all we showed him, and because he needed a bachelor party. Faramir because we guessed, very correctly, he would very adorably blush at everything we said. We also had Legolas once, but for some reason he refused to perform all the tests we put him through, and they were not so bad! He had to kiss Elrond and share a dirty secret of his father. I would understand him objecting to the second one, although he was incredibly drunk, but what he refused to do was kiss Elrond... Anyway, we had to forbid him from joining and that only made our "Front against Thranduil" point even stronger. Please note it is not against Mirkwood, but Thranduil. A very hypocritical prude that one, prim, acts as if he does not know what sex is even after having a son! He would have been a great addition to the league if he did not refuse to give into his desires." Glorfindel snickered and all the other Elves followed, seeming to know more then they showed.  
  
Erestor cleared his throat and looked wickedly at Haldir. He loved the initiation ceremonies.  
  
"Well, we should proceed now. Haldir we usually give tests that defy your personality, but there was not much we could find to defy you with, so we decided your test is very simple. A strip tease. For us. Now." He said between pauses.  
  
The March Warden's eyes widened marginally as he started in shock at the 'council' in front of him. He knew this league was about that...but he did not think the members themselves were put through such.  
  
Noticing the hesitance in the hazel eyes Celeborn spoke up. "Haldir? Is there a problem with the given task?"  
  
"Did you do that too?!" He asked horrified and blushed realizing the way he was addressing his lord. "My pardon..."  
  
"No, it is quite alright Haldir. No titles or differences here remember? Save for Glorfindel of course, who seems to enjoy his high position". The Golden Wood lord teased. Not all of us went through this, some did worse. So, are you doing it?"  
  
After a moment of silence Haldir seemed to return to his senses and he smirked standing up and bowing.  
  
"But of course I will! Just do not expect me to know how to... undo my spell after I am done. The consequences are entirely your responsibility." He said playfully receiving a look of approval from all in the room. Yes, Haldir fit the League perfectly.  
  
Celeborn stood up and fetched drinks for everyone save Haldir, knowing exactly what each liked. He stole a piece of bread and sat down munching on it, all expectantly waiting for Haldir's show to start.  
  
"There is no mood without music..." Haldir said pouting softly, his eyes glinting with mischief.  
  
Elrond quickly rose from his chair and walked over to the window. Opening it he smiled noticing the same group of friends that usually got together at the Halls of Fire after the evening meal and usually gathered in the gardens afterwards, was already there, and singing merrily. The raven haired Elf motioned for Glorfindel, who owned the room and would surprise the Elves much less with a request than the lord of the house himself.  
  
"Hey! My friends! I have heard your singing, and although I am too tired to join you, I would love to hear it better. Move over here and please play something...slower." A grin appeared on his lips as the young Elves complied and the blond returned to his seat leaving the window open, knowing they were high enough not to be seen by anyone.  
  
"There, you may start now."  
  
Haldir thought the song fit perfectly. One of the Elves was probably trying to seduce a lass or even a lad, and was singing slowly, in a bewitching and arousing tone, his voice smooth yet darkened by passion, only adding to the effect Haldir wanted to have.  
  
His hands worked his clothes in trained movements, moving as if they were made of fabric too, in delicate yet sensual movements, button after button until his outer tunic was cast across the room, his cat-like grin widening at the already wide eyed Elves.  
  
The lean body swung slowly with the rhythm of the song, moving from side to side, the sound of hands touching fabric and fabric touching stone fit perfectly the melodic voice sounding outside.  
  
Haldir's muscular yet lean, hairless chest stood proud to the watching eyes, his own closing, head tilting back simulating fervent pleasure at the feel of his own hands running up and down the firm torso effortlessly hypnotizing the audience.  
  
The war calloused hands traveled down his belt, torturing his audience by slowly unfastening it. Even the disposal of his boots turned out to a graceful dance, the predatory grin never fading as his clear eyes watched the anxiousness and hunger in the expectant eyes. Haldir turned sexy into an art.  
  
Haldir was beginning to untie his loincloth when an urgent knock sounded on the door, making a common grunt ring through the room.  
  
"Who is it?" Glorfindel asked.  
  
"It is Lindir, my Lord. I have a message for Lord Elrond and was told he headed this way."  
  
"Come in." The blond said ignoring Haldir's panicked look.  
  
"Stay." He mouthed to the silver haired Elf.  
  
Lindir opened the door and shuffled into the room, his white hair flowing with the breeze in the corridor as if they were silk strands. His innocent looking blue eyes scanned the room for Elrond and his mouth dropped open in shock as he saw Haldir standing practically naked in the middle of the room. He looked around horrified at the hungry and frustrated looks on the seated Elves and wizard and blushed furiously.  
  
"I am... I am sorry to interrupt, my Lords." He said lowering his head.  
  
"Well, you have already interrupted, so now tell us what you want." Elrond sounded harsher than he wanted too, but was deeply annoyed by the interruption.  
  
"I have a message for you." The minstrel spoke shyly, hurriedly crossing the room and handing it to his lord, his eyes wide, constantly sneaking to Haldir's form.  
  
"Lindir, why are you delivering messages if you are a minstrel?" Glorfindel asked with a curious look, but his true intentions were only to see if he managed to embarrass the young Elf any further.  
  
Erestor's eyes softened in pity when Lindir coughed nervously, looking like a frightened little elfling.  
  
"Well... I was the only one at the Hall when it arrived, I thought it would be easier to come deliver it myself then go find a servant to do it...maybe I should have went with the second." His voice sounded small, his eyes trained on Haldir, his brain trying to process the reason to such a scene to be taking place.  
  
"Lindir, this was a private meeting, meant for no intruders or interruptions." Glorfindel spoke sternly, realizing his friend's evil intents Erestor glared at him, knowing the blond was not truly mad, but enjoying himself.  
  
"I-I am so sorry, my deepest apologies, I did not mean to intrude...b-but the messenger said it was urgent... I.."  
  
"Shh, no word of this shall ever leave your mouth. Can we trust you to do that?" The Balrog Slayer continued his torture. Elrond and Mithrandir, the ones who would usually stand up for the younger Elf were entranced by the development, greatly curious about Lindir's reactions. Never before had someone managed to find them in this place, especially not during a session.  
  
"Lord Glorfindel, please believe me, I am not a talker, I hardly even speak at any rate, I swear no word of this will leave the room, I do not even remember anything, I am blind already!" Celeborn could see the young Elf was starting to panic and stood up.  
  
"Very well Lindir, you may leave now."  
  
"T-thank you my Lord." The white haired Elf hurried back to the exit.  
  
"Wait! We will finish what we... were doing, and then discuss deeply whether to trust you or not. I will be speaking with you in the morning Lindir."  
  
"Y-yes. Good evening." The minstrel bowed and practically flew out of the room. Haldir blushing almost as fiercely as Lindir turned to Glorfindel who was now laughing uncontrollably.  
  
"What was that?"  
  
"Yes my friend, that was not necessary, why did you do that?" Erestor asked knowing he would have been just as embarrassed as Lindir if he had found himself in such a situation.  
  
"I was trying to prove a point to myself before I told you about it. And I have succeeded." Glorfindel's eyes shone with mischief.  
  
"Then please enlighten us." Erestor said.  
  
"Well, I believe we found our Surprised member." He grinned maniacally exchanging a knowing glance with Erestor and feeling extremely proud at the double meaning to the title he had made up.  
  
TBC... 


	2. Part II

Part II  
  
Chapter summary: The League assembles and Glorfindel decides what Lindir will have to do to pay for his intrusion.  
  
Lindir shuffled nervously into the large common room where the meals were held. Assigned to sit at Elrond's table, the bard quickly reached his seat noticing all others were already present.  
  
"Ah, Lindir, what a fine morning! Come and sit beside me." Glorfindel invited friendlily. This time Elrond was the one sitting at the head of the table with Erestor on one side and Glorfindel on the other. Mithrandir sat between the advisor and the Lord of the Golden Wood with an empty seat between the blond Balrog slayer and Haldir, which was where he would be sitting. The long table held many other occupants who at the moment were not paying much attention to Lindir and the fierce blush gracing his cheeks as he sat down where he had been told. Looking at each one of those he had seen last night, the Elf felt almost frightened of what they could do.  
  
"Lindir, I missed you after you left my office last night." Glorfindel spoke in a seductive voice, making sure he was heard by all, leaning closer and putting an arm around Lindir's shoulders.  
  
"I could not stop thinking about you after you left, all night long I kept thinking...of what I shall do to you. I am so sorry when you came last night all the clothes were cast aside...but I could not help it."  
  
Erestor put a hand on his brow, covering his eyes and looked down feeling ashamed for both Lindir and Glorfindel. Elrond scratched his chin as he noticed the two fair Elves were the center of attention now.  
  
"M-my Lord I..."  
  
"Shhh," Glorfindel silenced Lindir by putting a slender finger against rosy lips.  
  
"You know we do not need those titles, not anymore." Forcing himself not to laugh and blow the jest, the warrior gave the younger Elf his most predatory look and licked his lips.  
  
"Lord...I mean Glorfindel you should be careful with what you say, your words...have double meaning." Lindir spoke in a rush, his usually ivory skin had a crimson touch to it, his sea blue eyes wide.  
  
"They do not to me, I know exactly what I want to say and what I want to be heard. You will come back and see me tonight, so we can...act on what happened last night. Now I must excuse myself, Lord Elrond." Glorfindel bowed before his lord and, caressing Lindir's flushed cheeks, left the hall grinning, half-expecting Erestor to follow, which he did.  
  
"Glorfindel, you evil, evil rag! I thought the boy was going to run away and never show his face to the light again!" Erestor's tone was half amused and half reprimanding of the blond's act.  
  
"Oh my friend, worry not, I was only teasing him, you can go and make your move on the boy, I am not interested in that way."  
  
"What?! Glorfindel, I am not interested in Lindir."  
  
"Of course not, the reason why you almost soak your robes with drool when he sings is because....well you will have to enlighten me on that one. Do not be a fool Erestor, I know you have ...grown attached to the Elfling ever since he offered to help reorganizing the music section of the library."  
  
Erestor grunted indignantly.  
  
"He is not an Elfling. And what are you planning for Lindir?"  
  
"Ah, I have so many initiation tasks I would like to give him...but you know, I have a particular one in mind...this will be so fun, too much fun to give him a sole task...I must think! Please do not be late for the meeting tonight. You will be required."  
  
Erestor chuckled at the wink the other gave him and continued on his way to Elrond's office, wondering what his friend had in store for them.  
  
Lindir walked to the gardens, closely watched by two sets of eyes.  
  
"Go, now."  
  
Nodding, Haldir set out after Lindir, grinning when he realized the Elf was heading to a secluded area of the gardens.  
  
Walking silently Haldir reached the white haired Elf and wrapped his arms around him and whispered a seductive 'Hello' into the pointy ear, receiving a surprised yelp and a little jump in response.  
  
Lindir leaped away from the March Warden trying to catch his breath from the fright.  
  
"Haldir, what are you doing? You scared me!"  
  
"I am sorry my beautiful minstrel, I only wanted to speak to you, in private." He again managed to put an arm around Lindir's waist and whisper close to the other's ear.  
  
"I was thinking maybe I could show you what you were so close to see back at Glorfindel's office, but this time, just you and I, so I might get the chance to see some of you too." Haldir grinned at the fierce blush that appeared on the minstrels pale cheeks and licked his lips.  
  
"I will at least see you tonight, won't I? At the meeting."  
  
"Ah...yes, I believe I have no means to escape that..." Lindir said swallowing hard.  
  
"No, you do not." Haldir grinned at the younger Elf again and set off, his face immediately turning a deep shade of red.  
  
"I cannot believe I just did that." He muttered to himself. "Glorfindel will pay for that one!"  
  
When night came the League members shot furtive glances at each other, anxious for the meeting to start. Celeborn played with a strand of silver hair, impatiently watching Mithrandir finish all of his pipe weed. Glorfindel had refused to give them a specific hour for the meeting and said that the moment he excused himself, they were to wait a few minutes and follow. Supper had ended half an hour ago and the blond Elda was still happily chatting with some of his warriors.  
  
Lindir kept singing, every time trying to find a better song so his presence would be needed and he would not be able to attend the scheduled meeting, or perhaps he would entertain so well, Glorfindel and the others would forget it. But that was not to be. Obviously being the center of attention while performing kept the warrior's mind on track, and when the minstrel was reaching the end of a very popular song, the blond stood up and excused himself, rolling his eyes at Celeborn's and Elrond's relieved expressions.  
  
"Lindir? Come, I will accompany you there." Erestor said offering an arm. "Do not be so frightened, nothing bad will happen, Glorfindel likes to bark, that is all."  
  
Lindir nodded and took the offered hand, excusing himself from the gathering and smiling gently at the protests to his early retirement. He felt strangely reassured having Erestor hold his hand all the way to the fated room.  
  
Lindir sat on the chair in the center of the room which Erestor had led him to and watched as the Elves and wizard entered and accommodated themselves.  
  
They sat in the same seats as the night before, save for Haldir, who was now fully dressed, although in simple leggings and a poet shirt took a seat next to Lord Celeborn.  
  
"Very well, it is again time to start another session of the Extraordinary League of Gentlemen."  
  
"Oi! Oi! Oi!" Came the reply in choral.  
  
Glorfindel spoke seriously and proceeded with their ritual. Lindir had his eyes trained on the floor not to chuckle at the name the league had chosen.  
  
"Tonight we have a very important matter to discuss. Lindir." The broad shouldered warrior pointed to the minstrel.  
  
"Lindir has discovered our secret meeting place and witnessed part of the activities taking place here last night. Now he has also heard of our name and it is unacceptable to let him go. He will have to join the league." Glorfindel spoke in a formal voice, almost as frightening as Elrond's when giving a tantrum.  
  
The white haired Elf shyly lifted his head and raised his hand asking permission to speak. So far that seemed to be the way they acted around here, as tough in a court session.  
  
"My Lords, I promised yesterday and will do so again now, nothing I saw or heard here will ever leave my lips."  
  
"You are right, it will not, because the members of the league are sworn to secrecy and that is our only guarantee you will not speak. Unless you wish to leave Imladris?"  
  
Glorfindel frowned at the warning glares Erestor and Elrond were giving him.  
  
"You do not have to scare Lindir like this! You know he will never be sent away for such foolishness!" Elrond whispered into his friend's ear.  
  
"I know Elrond, but this way we will make sure he joins...or at least perform his tests. We cannot let such a chance pass us by!" Glorfindel whispered back before returning his attention to Lindir.  
  
Haldir was ecstatic. Lord Celeborn had told him he would enjoy this visit to Imladris, but he had no idea it would be this much! This league sounded like a true delight, and he had had the luck of not being the newest member for long. The March Warden intently heard Elrond read the rules of the league and curiously watched Lindir's shocked gaze travel about the room. He knew the minstrel had understood what this group was about, but clearly had never expected such things from his lords, well from none of them save Glorfindel.  
  
"All understood?" Elrond asked seriously and taking pity on Lindir added, "All your questions will be answered later."  
  
"Yes...I understand." Nodding furiously Lindir was torn between expectation and fear. He knew very well Glorfindel would make him do something embarrassing, but yet the idea of such a group, of seeing his lords as they truly were and be part of such a select group made it difficult for him not to burst with joy. He had been trembling when the session started, but once he understood what this was all about, the feelings changed immediately.  
  
Waiting for Elrond to sit again, the president of the league gave Erestor a sideways glance smirking and stood up.  
  
"We have now to decide the tasks you will have to fulfill to be considered a part of this group."  
  
Glorfindel had always known it was stupid to read the rules before the initiation tests, but he did it on purpose, knowing the thought would also cross the mind of the new inductee and make him work harder to achieve his goals.  
  
"Your first test Lindir, will be to seduce someone." He said proudly hearing the sharp intake of breath that came from the minstrel as well as other members of the league.  
  
"So you will not have to waste time picking someone, we will write down the name of every Elf residing in Imladris, in front of you of course, and then you will chose one, but you will not tell anyone who that person is, understood?"  
  
Receiving a nod from the stunned white haired Elf Glorfindel continued, shooting a lopsided smirk at Erestor.  
  
"As I assume you are not very familiar with the whole idea of seduction, I will have Erestor tutor you, agreed?" The blond could see from the corner of his eye the other Elves and the wizard shake their heads wondering what he had in mind, after all there had to be a reason for him to assign Erestor, of all people, to teach the art of seduction.  
  
"You have a fortnight to complete this task, during the first week and a half Erestor will tutor you and help your plans, after that you are free to act, and when the day comes we want you to show us evidence of your success. Now Elrond, do you think he would look good in one of those diminutive leather loincloths?" The blond asked checking Lindir over.  
  
"WHAT?!" Lindir yelped jumping out of his chair and squeezing his eyes in anger when Glorfindel started to laugh.  
  
"Hey, we are all entitled to the mental picture; consider yourself lucky we do not really have one of those for you to dress in." The blond replied smirking.  
  
"We just have to wait until the day Thranduil visits, maybe he can lend us his." Erestor said bursting out with laughter and looking curiously as Elrond jumped upright.  
  
"I almost forgot! The message Lindir delivered last night!" As Elrond spoke his expression turned more and more devious.  
  
"King Thranduil is paying us a visit." The Lord of Imladris spoke, his grin widening at the cheers of the league members.  
  
"Ah! Finally a chance to put our corruption plans into action!" Celeborn said lightly.  
  
TBC... 


	3. Part III

Part III  
  
Chapter summary: Lindir has his first seduction lesson with Erestor. Rating: G – PG...  
  
Lindir cleared his throat and knocked on the door shifting on his feet.  
  
Erestor smiled at the elf's punctuality and headed for the door, opening it with a big smile.  
  
"Lindir! You are right on time, come on in."  
  
"Good evening Lord Erestor."  
  
The dark haired elf watched amusedly as Lindir shuffled into the room and wondered how on earth he would seduce someone. It was obvious Lindir had all the requirements to seduce someone, he was beautiful, intelligent, charming and had a enchanting voice, but that charmed people, it did not seduce. The art of seduction did not always demand beauty, but a sharp mind and good conversation, and of course the right personality, which happened to be the younger elf's problem. Erestor simply could not imagine the extremely shy minstrel acting like Glorfindel to conquer a one night stand.  
  
The advisor motioned for the other Lindir to take a seat at the dinner table he had asked to be set in his rooms.  
  
"Sit," Erestor also sat, clasping his hands together before resting his face on them.  
  
"Lindir, tonight we start our lessons. Are you nervous?" He asked merely trying to start some conversation, but all the answer he got was a nod.  
  
"Well, do not be, you will do well, you will learn all you need. It is in you, believe me, we just have to explore that side of you. Now, tell me, if you were to ...perform your task tonight, how would you proceed?"  
  
"Well, I guess I...would invite...him or her to dinner and...I guess I would make a picnic, under the night sky." Lindir spoke nodding, his voice seemed sure of what he was saying even though he paused to gather his thoughts before speaking and the elf seemed impressed with himself.  
  
Erestor nodded. "That is very nice, very romantic. The question is, what would you do next? Seduction is not only about the place you choose, or the time, it is mainly about the words you say and the way you act. Dinner is a great occasion for seduction, just as a walk in the gardens, or a private conversation. The setting matters very little if you are sure of how to proceed, but it is true that if you have a romantic setting you have more..."  
  
Erestor searched for the right word. "tools at your disposition." The dark haired elf stood to fetch a bottle of wine that was resting on the side table along with their dinner. Pouring some of the sweet beverage for them both, he took his place at the table and sipped calmly, knowing Lindir was probably wondering how the stern elf could possibly know anything about seduction.  
  
He had practiced quite a few times, but the real knowledge came from observing other's behavior, something that had always fascinated the elder elf.  
  
"Go on Lindir, what would you tell this elf? How would you act?"  
  
The white haired elf looked up into Erestor's eyes, mouth agape, scratching his cheek as he wondered what to say. "I would..praise their beauty and qualities and...ah...ask them to dance?"  
  
"That is good, the dance I mean. Praising one's beauty is sometimes too...affected; you can tell the intentions behind the words, so when seducing, instead of trying to hide, you should show them. For an example; your hair is extremely beautiful, meldir." Erestor said honestly, admiring the natural shine to Lindir's hair.  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"Yes, now, watch this," Grinning, the advisor stood and walked to Lindir. Kneeling beside the minstrel, he took a strand of the silk-like white hair, marveling at how soft it felt, before returning his mind to the task at hand. He brought the strand closer to him and inhaled the elf's scent and locking eyes with the younger elf he whispered: "Your hair is extremely beautiful, meldir."  
  
Watching the fair elf blush and avert his eyes Erestor smiled and reluctantly stood, returning to his chair.  
  
"You could notice the difference, could you not? Both in the way I spoke and the way you reacted. The words were the same, but the way I acted was not. Instead of hiding your intentions, make them clear, subtle words, not so subtle actions. Oh! And never break eye contact. Could you tell that even though I complimented your hair, doing so while looking into your eyes, was much more intimate and suggestive? Do you agree?"  
  
"Yes.." Lindir was amazed at how each word Erestor spoke made sense, he could imagine someone trying to seduce him in the way the advisor described, and the thought was thrilling. He intently watched the taller elf move, his eyes capturing the most subtle movements, the way the fabric of the elf's robes flowed around him, it all seemed to be conspiring. He could do this...he had to succeed in this task.  
  
"Very well, Lindir you were given fifteen days to achieve your goal and you should start approaching this elf as soon as possible, even before our lessons finish, that way you will have more time. Salad?" Erestor's honey colored eyes looked up questioningly and at Lindir's nod he served the young elf, then himself, and started eating.  
  
"Do you already have a plan of action?"  
  
Lindir seemed slightly surprised at the question, but nodded. Erestor mentally shook his head trying to imagine what kind of plan the elf's innocent mind could have come up with.  
  
"Ah..Erestor?"  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"What do you all...do, at these reunions?"  
  
"Ah, worry not Lindir, we simply gather to enjoy each others company as good friends and obviously, discuss the things all groups of friends discuss."  
  
"Just that?" Erestor smiled at Lindir's nervousness and nodded.  
  
"Then why...was Haldir almost naked when I walked in?"  
  
"Well, just as you have to seduce someone to become part of the League, that was his admission task."  
  
The white haired elf's eyes widened visibly and his cheeks flushed. "I will not have to do that, will I?"  
  
"No, I do not think so. Calm down Lindir, there is no need to look like you would flee Imladris at any moment, we will not do anything you do not want to." Erestor said grinning and returning his attention to the salad.  
  
"Oh, I should probably inform you, we will be meeting every day, but tomorrow the League will be dining together at a nearby tavern, and you will be joining us."  
  
"A Tavern? But, does not Lord Elrond have to be present at the evening meal here?"  
  
Erestor laughed warmly, his dark hair falling over the slender shoulder as he bent forward.  
  
"No Lindir, although he is the Lord of the house, Elrond has always made clear no such formalities should be held here. He just dines there every night for lack of other places to go, and if you promise to not share it with anyone, the reason why he arrives early in the main hall is his hunger."  
  
Lindir chuckled softly, discreetly analyzing the older elf. He knew Erestor was not the cold, detached elf people took him for, it was merely his behavior while on duty. He had helped the advisor in the library for some time now to know the 'rumors' were false, but still the dark haired elf seemed shy or reserved at the least, and now, although he was not as outgoing as Glorfindel - because that was a hard thing to be- Erestor seemed different, in a lighter mood, a more carefree behavior and it was a nice change.  
  
"Lindir, one of the things that would help you greatly on this task, as well as for the rest of your life, would be letting go of your shyness, there is really no reason for you to have it. Someone who performs in the Halls of Fire so masterfully entertaining and hypnotizing the crowd, should not be shy at all. That is one thing we will have to work on. Tomorrow, before the League meets for dinner, we will go to the nearby market."  
  
"To do what?"  
  
"To buy you some clothes. Now back to the seduction, a good way someone, even if momentarily, is working with your qualities, but making it seem as if you are unaware of them. For example, singing to your 'victim' could be good if done at the appropriated moment. Lord Elrond would very likely use his conversation skills, to befriend, flatter, and involve. Glorfindel would.."  
  
"Get naked?" Lindir offered and Erestor burst out laughing.  
  
"Oh yes, most definitely, he does think his body is his greatest quality, but then again it must be, with a one tracked mind like his, it could not be his intelligence."  
  
Lindir chuckled shyly afraid to offend the Balrog Slayer even thoughhe was not present.  
  
"What would you do Erestor?"  
  
"What?" He looked up surprised.  
  
"What quality would you use?"  
  
"Hmmm, my expertise in the art of seduction?" Erestor said grinning wickedly at the furious blush that crept into Lindir's cheeks.  
  
"I merely jest, but see, again, the right words, provoke the desired reaction. Words are essential my friend, but sometimes not needed. You have to know the right moment to stop."  
  
Lindir nodded and cleared his throat pushing the food around his plate. It was quite more complicated than it seemed.  
  
"Not hungry? I am not either. Come." Erestor said raising from his seat and offering the other his hand.  
  
Lindir shot a questioning look at Erestor but accepted the hand and stood.  
  
"Now, the dance. It is a very important weapon to be used Lindir. Why, you ask? Because of many factors, the proximity of the bodies, the almost public intimacy of being so close to another, the chance to whisper things only the intended ear can hear, the right rhythm setting the mood..." Erestor walked the younger elf to the balcony and stood in front of him admiring the way the moon illuminated the fair skin and pale hair, making them shine, the sky blue eyes reflected the silvery light of the night lightening them and giving the elegant elf an ethereal look.  
  
Lindir himself was lost watching Erestor, his honey eyes taking a darker hue under the darkened sky, the black hair flowing past his shoulders, strands flying with the soft breeze.  
  
"How do you danc,e Lindir?" Erestor asked motioning for the elf to position them.  
  
"Well...it depends, when dancing with a maiden, like this." He said placing Erestor's right hand his shoulder, his left hand on the other's waist, and joining his right hand with Erestor's left one, their bodies at a fair distance.  
  
"I do not tend to dance with lads unless it is for mere fun, but it would be pretty much the same way. Now, when Lord Glorfindel drags me to the dance floor, he tends to do like this." He said moving Erestor's arm around his neck and wrapping his own around the slender waist. "Of course he also presses so close I cannot breathe." He said chuckling along with the dark haired elf.  
  
"Well Glorfindel is right, body language is helpful too. His case is an exception of course, because his body language shows desire towards any moving being, excluding dwarves. But when you hold someone close like this, you tell them you want them close, even closer, if you dance slowly, rest your face against theirs, or on their shoulder, all of that shows intimacy." "When you are seducing someone, you should take the lead, the initiative, therefore, you would be dancing like you are now, arms around the elf's waist, his or hers around your neck, just like that. You should probably whisper things to them, you know...maybe I should just make you watch Glorfindel for a day, that should teach you all you need to know. Now you lead."  
  
Erestor watched amusedly as Lindir clearly had little experience dancing and moved tensely, almost to the point of stumbling over their feet.  
  
/This will be difficult, I can tell..,/Erestor thought letting go of the younger elf.  
  
"Let us go back inside, enough dancing for today." He said taking a delicate hand in his, touched only by music, and led the way. "If you do not have any other questions, I believe we are through for the night."  
  
"I..I do not have any at the moment, but I will surely have some by tomorrow."  
  
"All right then. We will meet after breakfast in my study and from there head to the market. Worry not about money, it has all been taken care of."  
  
Lindir nodded and blushed weakly. "Thank you Erestor, I am really anxious about this whole thing."  
  
"Ah! Nonsense, you will do great, just relax." The older elf said, patting the other's shoulder and bidding him goodnight.  
  
After closing the door Erestor threw himself face down on the bed and sighed. He did not think Lindir could seduce anyone, but he could surely bewitch, he knew it from experience.  
  
TBC... 


	4. Part IV

Part IV  
  
Summary: Glorfindel and Celeborn bicker, Erestor and Lindir go shopping. Lindir has a body part to big for his own good. And it is not what you are thinking! Well, it depends on what you are thinking...  
  
Rating: PG, for one word I think.  
  
"So, what did you plan for Lindir today?" Glorfindel whispered into Erestor's ear during breakfast.  
  
"We are going shopping."  
  
"Oh?"  
  
"Yes, he needs to build some self esteem and I have it planned out."  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Glorfindel, one would think you are more articulated than that." The advisor pointed out while sipping his tea.  
  
"Well, it is rather difficult with you running your hand up my thighs." The blonde Elda said grinning from ear to ear.  
  
"Glorfindel! I am not doing such thing...but if you do feel hands on your legs, let me warn you Mithrandir is sitting on your left." Erestor was delighted to see the shocked expression on Glorfindel's eyes.  
  
"I heard that!"  
  
"My apologies Mithrandir." Erestor said bowing his head.  
  
"Very well." The Wizard returned his attention to buttering his bread while eyeing suspiciously all elves sitting at the table.  
  
"What is wrong?" Glorfindel asked.  
  
The mage coughed nervously. "I am curious to whose name Lindir drew." He said smiling sheepishly when the Balrog Slayer burst out laughing. "Have you thought it could be you Glorfindel? If it is, how in the world will the boy seduce you?"  
  
"Oh please Mithrandir! If he snaps his fingers and says: me, you, no clothes, bedroom, oil, now; I would be naked before he mentioned 'no clothes'."  
  
Erestor spit out his tea coughing and turned to his friend cocking an eyebrow at the elf. "I did not know you had such an interest in Lindir."  
  
"Ha! Come on Erestor, really..."  
  
"Oh, right, you sleep with anything moving as long as it does not have a beard."  
  
"What about Cirdan?" Celeborn asked batting his eyelashes innocently.  
  
"You have lost all your elven grace, Celeborn."  
  
"I have been spending too much time with you, Glorfindel."  
  
"And noting you do that with your clothes on, it has been a waste of time so far." Glorfindel said grinning madly watching Erestor and Elrond choke on their food and Celeborn blush.  
  
"You never asked me to take them off Lord Glorfindel, it has been a miscommunication problem only." The lord of the Golden Wood answered smiling triumphantly.  
  
"I shall ask from now on, be certain I will. So, Erestor, have you molested Lindir yet?"  
  
"Glorfindel what is wrong with you? Are you having withdrawal symptoms? How dare you say something like that!" Erestor's face flushed in outrage and he fixed the high collar of his dark gray robes. "You had better manage that, Celeborn."  
  
"What? Why me? You are all insane! Do not look at me like that Glorfindel, I am not a rabbit on the run!" The silver haired elf's eyes widened in shock as Elrond's Seneschal almost kissed Erestor thankfully and stood going around the table and walking towards him. "'Get away from me, oh by the Valar...get him off of me!"  
  
"Oh please My Lord, I am merely leaning over to get the honey, do not think that highly of yourself."  
  
Celeborn stood up holding menacingly the butter knife "Glorfindel..."  
  
"You would not dare....Celeborn!"  
  
"Uh...oh" Celeborns eyes widened making him look millennia younger as he backed away from the Balrog Slayer, having just, accidentally, of course, splashed butter over the blonde's robes. "Wait, wait, I am sorry, I will buy you new robes! Glorfindel, I am still a lord, do not dare to get near me with the strawberry juice, Glorfindel!"  
  
"Have you noticed they are doing all that in front of everyone? So much for elven grace." Mithrandir whispered to Elrond as the inhabitants of Imladris watched bemusedly the Lords they respected so much, act as gang of Men after drinking dwarven ale.  
  
Elrond cleared his throat as he saw Lindir enter the room and the elves sitting at the main table straightened themselves, Glorfindel reluctantly took back his seat, rubbing a napkin over the stain on his green tunic.  
  
"Good morning Lindir, sit here." The blond said winking and patting Erestor's leg.  
  
"But Erestor is sitting there."  
  
"I know." Glorfindel wriggled an eyebrow and Elrond bent under the table to 'retrieve his fork' and stop himself for laughing and spitting the orange juice he had taken to drink now.  
  
"I appreciate you thinking I am comfortable enough to sit on, the Valar know how experienced you are on finding living seats," Erestor said arching an eyebrow "but Lindir and I are going shopping this morning, and we want to have time at our disposal, so we will be going."  
  
"But he did not even eat!"  
  
"I am quite all right Lord Glorfindel, I picked up an apple in the kitchens, I had to pay a visit."  
  
"Oh. But you ought to eat! In no time there will be nothing to grope there."  
  
Lindir's eyes widened terribly and he blushed. "Yes, let us go Lord Erestor. Thank you for your worry Lord Glorfindel." Lindir bowed gracefully, his light hair barely distinguishing from the white robes as the strands came to rest on his shoulders.  
  
"Oh! But Lord Celeborn and I are going with you!"  
  
"We are?"  
  
"But of course! You have to buy me those new robes." Erestor just rolled his eyes and grabbed Lindir's arm walking away from the pair and making his way to the nearby market.  
  
"I am sorry Lindir, I did not intend on them coming with us."  
  
The younger elf shrugged wondering just how much more of this he would have to take from 'The League'.  
  
Erestor led Lindir through the crowded market paying little attention to the tents and products being sold as he knew exactly where to head. Lindir on the other hand was quite marveled. He had, of course, been in this market dozens of times, but it had been quite a while ago and it had grown immensely. Where once stood less than twenty tents each selling different things, now the large alley went on until he lost sight of it and surely over a hundred tents were there now, with different products and a variety of similar ones too. Clothes, weapons, food, music instruments, animals, jewelry, there was all to be acquired.  
  
"Lindir, this is it." Erestor stopped in front on a large, straw colored tent, one of the largest they had passed by. Piles and piles of clothes were neatly folded, resting on top of several tables as well as exposed on wood hangers to show the quality of the products. Two piles of clothes were completely unorganized as customers rummaged through them examining the fabric, quality, price, finish and so on. The young minstrel noticed three maidens and a young male elf dressed alike in the same straw color of the tent fabric helping people that wandered in asking for information, trying on clothes, buying, or simply taking a look.  
  
After staring at the place for quite a few moments it slowly started to clear down until one of the attendant maidens was free. Erestor called her and the brown haired lady walked gracefully to them, her large coal eyes framed by thick black eyelashes drew attention to her, the slightly flushed cheeks giving her an aspect of pure joy and pleasure as an inviting smile blossomed on her lips.  
  
"Good morning, my lords, I am Britlha. Is there anything I can help you with?" She asked bowing respectfully, recognizing Erestor.  
  
"Yes there is, thank you. The young lord here needs some new clothes, but what he really needs is to build up his self confidence, so I was hoping you could help me with it." Turning to Lindir to let him know the words were directed to both. "I want him to pick the clothes he sees more fitting for a special occasion and I want you, Lindir, to point it out to me why it suits you. I want you to pick pieces that compliment your physical attributes." Erestor said swallowing nervously.  
  
"As I assume, Britlha, that you know very well how to see the outstanding qualities of a customer, I was hoping you could help me...judge his choices and guide him to better ones if needed." The advisor now spoke with the young lady smiling kindly at her as she smiled brightly, delighted at the idea.  
  
"Yes Lord Erestor, it will be my pleasure to assist you. Your name is Lindir, am I right?" She asked.  
  
"Yes." The minstrel said simply, smiling shyly.  
  
"Very well, come with me. Here we have our best clothes. The quality of the fabric is indisputable. All the silk here is from Lothlórien, where our father works with this specific fabric. The velvet, cotton, linen and any other fabrics were either brought from Mirkwood or made here in Imladris. We manufacture the clothes here in the Valley, the embroidered is made with special threads, some of them are embroidered with gold and silver threads. Please feel free to choose."  
  
Standing on a distance with Britlha, Erestor watched as Lindir shyly examined the clothes, touching the fabric, marveling with the embroidered, unfolding them to measure the size.  
  
"My Lord, may I ask why he would have a low self esteem?"  
  
"I believe it is only his shyness, but we will see to that, will we not?" Erestor asked in a friendly tone looking over his shoulder to see if he could spot Glorfindel and Celeborn. So far, no sign of them. Noticing Lindir was looking expectantly at him, the dark haired elf walked over.  
  
"Have you chosen?"  
  
"Yes..."  
  
"Can he try it on?" Erestor asked the attendant.  
  
"But of course. Follow me, there is a small closed 'room' with a mirror behind the curtain." Leading the white haired elf to the small place and separating it from the rest of the tent by closing the curtain the elleth held the fabric closed. "If you need any help, I am right here."  
  
"Lindir are you ready?" Erestor asked tapping his foot on the ground after waiting for a few minutes.  
  
"Yes. I will be out in a moment."  
  
Lindir shyly opened the curtain and stepped out. Erestor's eyes widened at the sight.  
  
"What in the Valar's name are you wearing(!" He almost yelled, regretting seeing the minstrel flinch.  
  
"I mean, I am sorry, but...why did you choose this!" He said pointing at the hideous clothes.  
  
"You did not like it(!" Lindir seemed almost outraged.  
  
Erestor arched an eyebrow analyzing the clothes, good lord! Lindir had put on yellow leggings and a blood red shirt and the combination was eye hurting. The elf just stood there fidgeting.  
  
"Well, no."  
  
Erestor calmed down, not wanting to scare Lindir. He looked to his side and noticed Celeborn and Glorfindel were approaching, but ignored them.  
  
"Why did you pick these clothes(" He asked blithely.  
  
Lindir's big blue eyes looked up from his hands.  
  
"I...I thought the red would make a contrast...with my hair. And...I am sorry. I will choose another outfit."  
  
Erestor walked over to Lindir and placed a hand on the elf's arm, smiling.  
  
"Do not apologize Lindir, I should apologize, I did not mean to be rude. I was surprised. Try not to choose such bright colors, they take the attention from you to your clothes. Instead of complimenting you they steal the focus."  
  
Britlha stepped up beside Erestor, smiling as well. "Lord Erestor is correct, Lindir. Colorful pieces are complimenting and attractive, but if combined with the right clothes. This red shirt would look lovely with black leggings, but two bright colored items usually do not work well together."  
  
Lindir nodded. "I understand."  
  
"Good. Now pick another outfit and remember to choose it to compliment your features, not only because you like the colors, despite them being discreet or not." Erestor said.  
  
Lindir nodded and rummaged through the piles of clothes finally picking a new set a clothes. From afar, Erestor could not tell what colors they were. He turned to the maiden and addressed her.  
  
"Do you have any black outfits( Completely black. I know it can be a dull color, but I think it will be a nice contrast with his skin and hair, to use at night. Oh, and light colored clothes as well, please. Sky blue, green, I trust your judgment. There are clothes that would look great on him, but I doubt he will choose them, so I want to buy them as well."  
  
The elleth nodded, a little intrigued about the whole episode, but excited to make such a big sale for the chief advisor of Imladris and a renowned minstrel. It would be great for business.  
  
After some time of waiting, Glorfindel and Celeborn finally reached them. The blonde elf with an impossibly wide grin.  
  
"Have you not peeked(" He asked leaning over the table Erestor was standing by and supporting himself with his hands.  
  
"Peeked what("  
  
"Erestor, you may be demure and respectful, but you are not a fool, much less an innocent elfling. I mean Lindir."  
  
Beside him, Celeborn apparently had found an edible flower and was quietly munching on it, as he liked to do. Glorifndel just shot an annoyed glance at the Golden Wood king and rolled his eyes before turning to Erestor.  
  
"Of course I have not peeked! I am not you, Glorfindel."  
  
"Oh please Er..." Glorfindel stopped when Lindir spoke.  
  
"Lord Glorfindel( Oh, well, I am coming out in a moment." He said nervously.  
  
Britlha opened the curtain and Erestor looked for something to steady him as Lindir walked out of the room. He was wearing black, polished leather, boots and black leggings, a white shirt, that Erestor came to notice, was made of a transparent material that moved gently with the elf's movement's, making it a shame he had a tunic on top of it, allowing only the transparent sleeves to how. The tunic was of a deep blue resembling a summer night sky after the sun had sat, with a remainder of light still illuminating it, making it not quite black. Silver embroidery adorned the tunic in simple, but magnificently worked patterns.  
  
There was something incredibly complimenting about that outfit on Lindir, and when many would have chosen bright colors and silk as fabric, the discreet clothes seemed to make the young minstrel stand out even more, because he was not dressed to catch everyone's attention, he was dressed to catch only one pair of eyes. Yes, he was learning well.  
  
Celeborn's flower fell off his lips as his mouth dropped open. Glorfindel nudged him and then turned to Lindir as well. The minstrel moved as gracefully as always, but there seemed to be something different, not quite right. The pants seemed tight.  
  
"You look incredible, Lindir." Erestor said.  
  
"Thank you...but it is uncomfortable, they are tight." Lindir shifted and watched nervously as Britlha approached him and crouched examining the pants and chuckling when suddenly there was a 'pop' and the pants opened.  
  
Lindir's eyes widened and he grabbed the pants just in time, the attendant helping him.  
  
"What is wrong( Why did the button just pop(" Glorfindel asked, voicing Erestor's question.  
  
"It seems you have an advantaged backside, Lindir." Britlha said chuckling.  
  
Erestor frowned. "What("  
  
"He has a big butt" Celeborn whispered to the advisor, whose eyes widened just as much as Lindir's. "It is a great feature though." The Golden Wood lord commented nonchalantly.  
  
While Lindir tried to hide his face, Glorfindel's had taken a maniac expression. "Erestor! Go there and feel it up!"  
  
"WHAT(!" Erestor's face flushed with outrage.  
  
"Well if you will not, I will." Glorfindel launched himself in Lindir's direction, but before he could reach him, Erestor grabbed him by the waist.  
  
"Do not dare!" He said and glared at Celeborn, who just stood watching and chuckling.  
  
"Celeborn! Help me!"  
  
"Glorfindel!" Celeborn spoke up seriously for the first time. "Act according to your age." He said taking a firm hold on the blonde's arm, allowing Erestor to let go.  
  
"If I do that I will just lay still forever, because If I were of any other race I would have decomposed right now."  
  
"But you are not! You are an Elf, a wise one! Act the part, will you( Why can you never take anything seriously(!" Celeborn lashed out, annoyed Glorfindel would go this far and embarrass Lindir.  
  
"Take seriously( I take seriously what I have to! Life would be to sad if I took it all seriously! And who are you to speak "Muncher"( All you do is stand and watch, munching on something!"  
  
"Oh for the Valar's sake! You have been behaving as elflings since the early morning! You are Elf lords and there are people watching! They will not only think you are insane, but Elrond as well, for employing you, and for marrying your daughter." Erestor said turning to each elf, looking apologetically at the crowd that had gathered.  
  
Lindir by now had changed back to his clothes, finding it the perfect excuse to hide for some time and exchanged the pants for a larger number. He was now back inside the changing room, with Britlha taking his measures so their could tailor him pants.  
  
After having that done, he waited inside the closed room until the noise died down and then left. He looked around seeing Celeborn and Glorfindel were gone, and Erestor stood by a table waiting quietly as if nothing had happened.  
  
"Where did they go(" Lindir asked blushing faintly and approaching his seduction tutor.  
  
"I sent them away. They were with those grumpy faces, mumbling, but together." Erestor laughed. "No matter if they are fighting or arguing or not even talking to each other, they do not stay apart."  
  
Lindir smiled "Can we go now(" He asked.  
  
"Surely. I was very pleased with your second choice of clothes, they will all be delivered to you today, or in two days the ones that have to be tailored."  
  
"Thank you."  
  
"Oh it was no sacrifice, Lindir. Now let us go, I have some matters to discuss with Elrond."  
  
Lindir nodded and followed Erestor out of the tent, thanking the attendant and apologizing once more. He could tell people would be talking about their Seneschal's and Lord Celeborn's bickering in no time.  
  
They walked side by side, discussing the happened.  
  
"What was that about(" Lindir asked.  
  
"Honestly( Pent up passion."  
  
Lindir chuckled and looked questioningly at Erestor.  
  
"Well, it has been obvious for quite some time Glorfindel is making moves on Celeborn, but believe it or not, he is the only person Glorfindel does not have the courage to simply seduce." The advisor said amusedly.  
  
"Maybe because Lord Celeborn is the one he does not wish only to seduce( Maybe he really likes him."  
  
"I believe you are right, Lindir. Those are my thoughts as well. I believe Celeborn returns whatever feeling it is they share, but they are stubborn. Glorfindel has been lonely for millennia, and Galadriel departed quite some time ago, her path and Celeborn's did not lay together and so they broke apart."  
  
"They should get together." Lindir said quietly.  
  
"Oh they will, at one point they will stop fooling around. They are stubborn, but not foolish enough to pass out a chance at being happy."  
  
With that their conversation seemed to reach an end and they were almost exiting the wide street with the tents when Lindir jumped and stopped, eyes wide.  
  
"Erestor, did you just slap my buttocks("  
  
"What(" He seemed horrified. "I am sorry Lindir, I knew I had bumped into someone, I did not know it was you." Erestor said coughing.  
  
Lindir's eyes narrowed shooting a murderous look at the advisor. "You did it on purpose."  
  
"Me( Of course not! I am not Glorfindel!"  
  
"You did it on purpose." Lindir stated again and Erestor's resolve seemed to crumble as blood ran up to stain his cheeks.  
  
"You did it!" Lindir yelled.  
  
"I am sorry! But look at that!" He said pointing at Lindir's buttocks. "They were calling to me, standing out like that!" Erestor seemed almost annoyed with himself, but how could he not( He would have to cut his hand off because of the itching if he did not touch it.  
  
"Ohhhhhh Erestor, I never expected that from you!"  
  
"I said I am sorry!"  
  
"We will see just how sorry you are." Lindir stepped forth.  
  
"What are you doing(" Erestor stepped back.  
  
"Chasing you." Lindir said and they both broke into a run, all the way up into the market again, with a yelling Erestor begging for forgiveness and Lindir mentally listing the revenge possibilities he had.  
  
"I will ally with Glorfindel!" He yelled slowing down a bit, panting after running for a long time.  
  
Erestor stopped dead on his tracks. "Oh no. No, not that! I will do anything! But not Glorfindel."  
  
Lindir grinned a most uncharacteristic predatory grin. "I will be nice to you, this time. We will see about it if it happens again." He said, leaning in to whisper what Erestor would have to do.  
  
TBC... 


End file.
